


Going numb

by Mishka_Kulikova



Category: Teenage Bounty Hunters
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:54:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 16,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26124565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mishka_Kulikova/pseuds/Mishka_Kulikova
Summary: This is post episode 10. Focused on the interactions that April and Sterling would have after everything, and how every interaction has such a tangible tension.
Relationships: Sterling Wesley/April Stevens
Comments: 214
Kudos: 568





	1. Part one

Sterling walks into school, her mind hazy, it feels like she is watching and interacting with the world through opaque glass. She is too out of it to even particularly care that April has spotted her in the corridor and is striding towards her. 

-Hey Sterl. 

Oh God, thought Sterling, why did April have to use her nickname for her, it felt too raw, like a secret name that only April knew. 

-Hi April.

-Why do you look like you just got back from hell?

-Aww thank you, April, you always know what to say to make me feel better. –Sterling bit back

-You haven’t been in school for the past two weeks, I thought you had died. - April tried to sound accusative, but she couldn’t help but have some tone of worry slip through. 

-Yeah well, “She hath risen again” I’m not dead, not that you even cared to check. – Sterling hated herself for saying that last bit, it made her sound weak and desperate, when the intention was to point out April’s heartlessness. But with April she never seemed to be able to get her words across the way she wanted to. 

-You weren’t active on any of your socials, never online, so I assumed there would be little point in trying to text you, besides what would there be to say?- April didn’t go on to explain how she had also been scouting Sterling’s house only to find that no one was home. Occasionally one of the parents would stop by to pick something up, but there was never any sign of either of the twins.

-Oh I don’t know April, you could have asked how I was, where I was, if I had been eaten by something, anything. 

-I thought you were avoiding me, I wanted to give you space.

-Ha, wow, of course, I should have guessed, everything is about you. Well newsflash your highness, turns out my life doesn’t revolve around April Stevens, and who would have guessed it, the world doesn’t revolve around you either.- Sterling’s hazy view of the world was gone, instead, it was replaced with the opposite, everything felt too close, in sharp hot focus.

-Why are you being so mean Sterl, that’s usually my job.- April was trying to lighten the mood, Sterlings strangely non-blinking stare was unnerving her.

-Yes, you are right it is your job. – Sterling’s haze was back, the bell had rung, and the hallways were starting to empty. – I think I’m gonna head to class. There’s a lot of work I need to catch up on.

-Oh that’s why I came over to talk to you. I made some notes for you to catch up on. -April handed Sterling the notes, it felt like she was following a script she had prepared, devoid of any emotions, a business transaction. Trying desperately to not let herself feel what she knew making those notes meant about her own feelings towards Sterling.

Sterling stared at the pages in her hands blankly. – Oh, thanks. - She started to walk away, but April grabbed her by the arm. Sterling froze on the spot.

-Why are you acting so weird then? And we’ve established that it doesn’t revolve around me, so you don’t need to clarify that again. What is it then?

Sterling could feel the sharp hot red focus coming back. –Why do you care? Also who are you to even begin to question my behaviour?

-It’s just that you seem really different.

-So now you know what it feels like, huh? To have someone suddenly act really different around you with no explanation. Jeez Louise I wonder what that feels like, it’s not like I would have any idea. No, everyone around me only ever acts how they feel and tells me the truth, so unfortunately I -

-Okay! - April yelled as she squeezed Sterling’s arm. – I get it you are going through a lot right now, whatever it is, I understand that you don’t want to share, but if you do, I’m sorry and I’m here and-

April started to place her free hand on Sterling’s other arm, before Sterling whipped both of April’s hands away and gasped covering her mouth with her own hands. Both girls stood still, staring at each other, just the sound of their breathing. After a beat Sterling turned on her heel and walked briskly down the corridor to class, leaving April standing frozen behind her.


	2. Part two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok as a warning, it is revealed that Sterling has slept again with Luke, but I promise it will never happen again, it was just, to quote April, "misdirected" emotions. I'm really sorry if that upsets you. I promise it will get better from here.

The next day Sterling finds April at lunch sitting by herself, clearly, her possy hadn’t joined her quite yet. Sterling slid next to April, who upon seeing who was suddenly beside her got really startled and blushed only to quickly compose herself, trying to keep a blank expression even if Sterling was sitting uncomfortably close to her.

-Hey April, ooh that’s a nice looking lunch, what is it, bacon, lettuce, I here that’s good for yo-

-Did you come here just to talk about my sandwich, because I can leave you two alone if you want?

-No, I…just, I wanted to apologise about last time. I know I was extra cranky and it was uncalled for, there’s just a lot on my plate, and yeah, I just wanted to say sorry. – Sterling was looking at April all wide-eyed and puppyish, whilst April was trying the blankest expression she could muster.

-OK

-I know you must be going through a lot with all the new family dynamics, and I shouldn’t have been so, well you know, intense at you. Especially with those lovely revision notes you gave me, you must teach me your colour coding system someday because it’s really-

-Please stop. – April said, barely a whisper.

-Stop what?

-Being… nice. – The last word was hardly audible from April’s lips. She was looking down at her food, avoiding all eye contact

-Oh, umm.. sorry again?

April couldn’t help but snicker.

-It’s just more difficult when you’re being all saintly.

Sterling couldn’t help herself before she said – I actually find it harder when you get all hot and angry- she stopped herself before she could embarrass herself more. The air suddenly got very heavy.

Then the possy finally arrived. Ezekiel and Hannah B. were having some heated discussion about whether or not it was ok to baptise ones pets, but the two girls didn’t seem to notice, eyes locked onto each others. It was Sterling who finally broke it when Ezekiel started addressing her.

-Hey, congratulations, I heard you and Luke were back -

-Yep-Sterling cut him off. April’s posture instantly changed, she was all stiff and upright, glaring daggers at both Ezekiel and Sterling.

-Yep, yes, yeah. I was going to actually come to your table and tell April myself, because you see, ummm.. yes me and Luke.. umm, we um, slept together again, and that it was a one time thing, sort of letting off steam from ummm… something else. –Sterling could hardly get her words out, it shouldn’t be a big deal, April had clearly ended whatever their thing was, and she was allowed to do what she wanted, even though that wasn’t really what she wanted.

\- Congratulations, I’m so happy for you. Invite me to the wedding. Would a toaster do as a gift? – April said in a mocking tone.

-Oh wow, that’s lovely –Hannah B. said earnestly before Ezekiel quickly laid his hand on her arm to stop her.

-Is that the reaction you wanted Sterling?

-No, I just-

-Because guess what, I don’t actually care, you can sleep with whoever you want, no one seems to be able to stop you anyway. You can sleep with Ezekiel for all I care- A gasp and gagging noises came from April’s friends. -Also, Why did you need to tell me yourself? To gloat? You can quite happily have that meatloaf all to your own … stupid body

\- I know, I just, I mean you know what the rumour mill is like at this school. And after last time and how everything got slightly muddled. I wanted to make sure you knew, that it was a onetime thing, I actually made him be quiet the whole time, I-

\- Why would April care? – Interjected Ezekiel

Both girls looked flustered. But April managed to compose herself first.

-Yeah, why would I care? I’ve never cared about a single bone in your body, -she looked down- especially that bone- April hated how everything that came out of her mouth sounded like, well that.

-Actually I just remembered I need to go.. water Ellen's plants. Ezekiel and Hannah B. I’ll see you both third period, bring the extra highlighters, we will need them. – she turned to Sterling. – And see you.

April couldn't finish before she knew she had to leave right then and there before she broke down into tears. So she practically sprinted to a bathroom. She was the one who had ended it. She shouldn't have expected anything else. She felt angry and tired, and angry at being tired, and tired of being angry, and then she suddenly just became numb.


	3. Part three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> excited to finally write this chapter, enjoy :)

Sterling barged into the bathroom that she had just seen April run into. There she found her, hands gripping the countertop, looking dead-eyed at her own reflection in the mirror. She didn’t turn. 

-April?- Sterling cautiously walked over. Still no reaction.

She slid her arms around April, giving her a tight hug, but April still didn’t turn. She could feel her heartbeat through her chest. After some time they had matched each other’s breathing, rising and falling in unison. Sterling nudged her face into April’s neck, where she murmured. -I’m so sorry. 

Finally, April turned and looked directly at Sterling. –Sorry for what? You can do what you want, or well, who you want. – she paused and took a deep breath- I just hate that I’m this upset and angry, it’s a weakness, it felt like a punch Sterl. – her voice got quieter- I should be able to take a punch. 

Sterling grabbed Aprils arms, bending to eye level, she practically wanted to shake the girl.-No, no, you are allowed to feel. Actually especially you, you hold back so much. Although you sure do still manage to get a lot of raw emotion slip by –they both smiled.- You shouldn’t feel bad for your emotions ever. It’s not a weakness to have them, it’s a strength, and you’re the strongest person I know. You were the one who taught me how amazing it is to actually listen to what’s in here. – At that Sterling placed April’s hand on her own chest, gently stroking her thumb along April’s fingers. After a pause, April took her hand away.

-Well, I can’t listen to that right now. I am my daddy’s daughter first and that’s what matters. – she cocked her head and half-smiled up at Sterling- But I don’t see why we must make our lives more difficult for each other, so maybe we can drop the whole enemies act. And be friends, just your friendly neighbourhood gal pals. We can get an A in friendship. 

Sterling scoffed- Ha, Yep, an A plus plus, 110%.- Both girls laughed at the memory of sweet Ellen and their project, sighed and fell into a heavy silence. Remembering how the evening ended. 

-Ok great- said Sterling- it was lovely doing business with you.-for some reason, probably out of her own awkwardness and desire to cheer April up by making a fool of herself, she stuck out her hand out for a handshake. Sterling was about to retract it, but April actually laughed at Sterling and shook it. After the shake they didn’t let go, their hands held onto each other, hanging limply between them. 

This time when Sterling went in for a hug, April didn’t stay stiff, instead, she embraced Sterling back, she felt warm inside, and neither of them said a word. Suddenly the bathroom door was pushed open, April shoved Sterling and herself into one of the cubicles, as a group of girls entered laughing and talking loudly.

April and Sterling looked at each other.

-Why did you push us in here?- Sterling whispered as she bent down to April’s ear. 

-I don’t know, I panicked.

-Well excellent crisis handling, I’ll make sure to be on your team when rapture hits. -April rolled her eyes at that. Sterling kept going. -I mean we could just leave. Girls pee together all the time. 

-Yes, girls do, but I don’t know if April and Sterling do.

-You mean Sterling and April, why does your name get to go first?

-It sounds better, also shush. 

Sterling didn’t respond. Afraid she would let slip how April’s aggressive “shush” made her all numb. 

-Let’s just wait it out.- whispered April.

-Sounds fun, can’t think of anything I would love more.

-You can always sit down if you are going be all grouchy.

-What and get an instant concoction of chlamydia and Hepatitis A, B, and maybe even a new strand of Hepatitis altogether, researchers will flock across the country to test and experiment on me, gee thank you. 

April uttered an exasperated sigh. –Just sit down- Sterling sat instantly without another question. April looked down on her, smirking. She slowly straddled Stirling’s lap and whispered into her ear. – Glad to see you still follow my orders.- Sterling couldn’t help but let a noise escape from her throat. The other girls in the bathroom knocked on their cubicle door asking if she was all right. April looked pointedly at Sterling, who practically whimpered- Yes, yes, all fine, my lunch didn’t agree with me that’s all, who knew brie and mayo, not a good combo.

The girls quickly left after that. 

-Not fair- said Sterling, as April stood back up and opened the door. – That wasn’t a very friend thing to do.

\- I believe friends partake in the occasional tease, and I couldn’t miss such an opportunity, now could I? But yes- here April’s tone got more serious- from here on out, friends, not enemies, and not well you know. We’re just friends, how hard can it be? 

Sterling nodded. April quickly checked herself over in the mirror, before opening the bathroom door. She turned just before she left –Bye friend- she said as the door closed. Sterling was left alone in the bathroom, a small –bye- falling from her lips.


	4. Part four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, i know this is just a subversion of one of the episodes. But it's a school, they would have more than one project per year. Also, who doesn't love a good plot-driven reason that they have to spend time alone together? P.s. I can also pretend it was an intentional inversion of April and Sterling's roles for who is having family issues and at their lowest and so on. But not really.

The next day Sterling walked into Ellen’s class, she was a bit late after this morning’s family argument. Ellen smiled brightly as Sterling entered.

-Oh hi, sweetie. It’s not like you to be late, but I’m sure you had your reason. Saving some stray poor run over animal perhaps? Why don’t you take a seat?  
Sterling smiled back and nodded rather than try and go into the whole explanation for her being late. She looked around the class for an empty spot, obviously, the only free one was next to April. April patted the seat, with a big teasing smile. Sterling walked over for lack of other options, even though she really did not feel strong enough for April today, not after the morning she had just had. 

Ellen carried on –Now as I was saying, today is a very special day. Second only to Easter, Christmas and May the third. That’s my Birthday- She pointed at everyone- so make a note of that. No, during this week you get to work on a very exciting project. Oooh, I love this part, the suspense of it all, preparing a last supper!!!-the class groaned.

-Together we will make a big old banquet for the whole class and anyone else you want to invite and then we can all feast on your scrumptious delicacies. Now I have already teamed you up with your specific roles, to save you the awkward, ooh who do I work with, situation. –Ellen starts listing the groups and jobs.

\- April and Sterling,- Both tense up- you worked so well as a team last time, so I am giving you the very special role of making Jesus’s body, the bread! It’s up to you how many you bake and what kind, but I would recommend a minimum of five loaves, because, I’ll let you in on a little secret here. Three years ago, people weren’t being very Christian when sharing the four loaves provided.- She finished giving out the roles.- Ok now I bet you are all so excited to start, so for the rest of the class, I will just let you guys plan and discuss. If you have any questions I’m always here for you, not going anywhere, never have and never will, forever. Discuss!!

April looked over to Sterling – Well I guess we are teammates again.

-Yeah I guess so.

-Are you ok? You seem a bit off? –April reached out instinctively to place her hand on Sterling’s arm, but Sterling quickly retracted her own arm. Then looked apologetically back at April and tried to smile.

-It’s just family stuff, you know.

-Yeah, I know what that’s like. – There was a slight pause. – Sorry, I mean, you can tell me if you want, you were a surprisingly attentive listener when I spoke about my dad, it’s only fair I return the favour.

-Hah, that’s sweet – At this April blushed- but I really can’t get into it all. But thanks’ for trying. You just went up a grade in friendship – Sterling joke punched April’s arm. At this, they both smiled. Sterling cleared her throat and composed herself more. – So what’s the plan for the bread?

April used her best mocking seductive tone -You mean Jesus’s toned supple body.

Sterling couldn’t help but scoff – Like you would go anywhere near his body.

The comment took April by surprise, a flash of fear on her face that maybe someone heard and understood the meaning. But she quickly realised everyone else was too engrossed in their own conversations to notice. –Perhaps not, but by the way Ellen said “body” she clearly wants a slice of that.

-Yeah, she definitely has a type, you should hear her talk about Moses.

-I know right? – laughed April. Sterling tried to keep the flow going, but she couldn’t think straight, April was looking directly at her and her eyes were so big and pretty and the topic of even bread innuendos was a bit too much right now. She had to change the subject.

\- I was thinking we could do it at mine? – At this April raised a sharp eyebrow- I.. I meant the baking, we have at least two ovens. Knowing my mum, there might even be a third one hidden that I don’t know about.–April was surprised at how genuinely angry Sterling sounded about the prospect of there being a secret oven.

\- Sure we can bake at yours- April instinctively in trying to comfort placed her hand on Sterling’s thigh- as long as that’s ok with whatever’s happening at home.

Sterling seemed to relax- Yeah it’s fine. If the banquet is on Friday, then you can come round on Thursday. Plus the house will be empty, Blair has her music lessons – suddenly Sterling starts aggressively whispering- which I didn’t tell you about, she would kill me for telling you, but she’s really good at it, so I don’t know why she wants to keep it a secret. She says it’s to preserve her image, but I don’t see why anyone would care- she started talking normally again- Sorry got off track, but my parents are out as well. So it would just be the two of us. – Sterling realised as she said it that maybe that wasn’t actually a great thing for the two of them, but tried to not show that train of thought. April was also trying her hardest to keep a neutral facial expression. 

-Thursday it is. We can send each other recipe ideas and make a list of all the ingredients we will need. And then you can check off the ones that you have at home, and then I can check if we have any of the ones you don’t have, and then I can go to the store and -

-Maybe make a colour coded spreadsheet, make a couple of graphs too.

-Stop teasing. - There was that lopsided smile Sterling adored.

\- Oh so you can tease me, but I can’t tease you?

-Yes, exactly. Plus don’t make it sound like you don’t love how organised I am. – At this she leaned in closer to Sterling- I’m also efficient. 

-I hate you.

-Good, the feelings are mutual. – They both grinned.


	5. Part five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was this inspired by me finding out that Devon Hales can sing? Mayhaps

Sterling opens the front door. There was April, carrying a basket with seemingly at least 7 different types of flour. 

\- You rang. 

\- Yes I believe that is what doorbells are for.

-Oh, yes hmm. Umm… come in. - Sterling tried to take some of the bags of flour to help April, but she was having none of it and stormed through into the kitchen. 

\- I brought the rye flour, the gluten free flour, whole wheat flour-

\- Cool.-Sterling interrupted her- Do you want a refreshment? We have water, orange juice, apple juice, milk, almond milk, smoothie- 

-Oh aren’t you a funny one? 

-I try. –Sterling said, all perky. April rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help but smile.

-Well there’s always room for improvement. 

-No, but seriously, do you want a glass of water? - April nodded in agreement. She started looking round the kitchen, whilst Sterling poured her a glass. 

-The kitchen looks smaller than I remember. –April’s voice sounded smaller as well.

-Oh yeah, you must have last been here when you were, what 10? 11?

-Yeah during the last project, you didn’t let me out of the basement once.

Sterling laughed. – It was a woodworking shop, but yes. I’m surprised the kitchen looks smaller, you haven’t grown that much since fifth grade. 

April couldn’t believe the nerve Sterling had. -I may be Christian, but I hope you know that will absolutely not stop me from killing you in your sleep. 

Sterling laughed. – No, I like your height. It’s – she trailed off. Afraid of how she would finish that sentence – So the bread?

-Great save. But yes. If you start making the dough for the rye bread I can start on the sourdough. 

-Cool. - Sterling turned on the radio for background and they started working on their dough. After about twenty minutes of mostly comfortable silence between them, that was occasionally broken by April asking where a particular cooking utensil was, Sterling noticed that April was starting to hum along to the radio. She dared not point it out unless it made April stop. Then something magical happened. Sia’s Chandelier started playing and Sterling thought she would risk it and start singing along to it, to see if April would join in. After a beat, April started to sing as well. Not just sing, but perform, to Sterling, who suddenly had no idea what to do with herself, she hadn’t expected her plan to work, and she certainly hadn’t expected for April’s voice to sound so beautiful. What she especially hadn’t expected was for April to hit the notes for the chorus, her voice belting them out perfectly. Sterling stared at her, in awe each time, and then would go back to join her in the song for the verses, using wooden spoons and rolling pins as microphones, the flour was getting everywhere. Finally, the song was over and both collapsed to the floor laughing leaning against the oven. Both girls were out of breath, red in the face from the physical exertion of it all. Sterling looked over to April and spoke.

-I can’t believe you sang that.

-Why? It’s a popular song. 

-No that’s not what I meant. I mean I can’t believe you sang it well. You were… exceptional.

-Well, I have many hidden talents. – April said suggestively trying to make the conversation less serious. April found that she was trying to deflect Sterling’s compliment, usually, she bathed in any positive affirmation, but from Sterling, it felt too high a concentrate, pure and overwhelming.

\- I love how there’s so much in you, that it overspills sometimes. – Sterling was suddenly aware of how close April was and she wasn’t sure if it was because they were sitting next to the preheated oven, but she suddenly felt very hot. April didn’t say anything back, but her face softened.

-Can I hug you? Or hold your hand, or something, I feel like I’m going to explode.

-Really? My singing did that for you?

-Please? – Sterling looked so genuinely in pain, that April couldn’t help but give way. 

-Okay. - She delicately took Sterling’s hand, looked at it for a while, turning it over in her own hands, finally she placed a faint kiss on Sterling’s knuckles and then interlaced their fingers. –But only for one song. 

They sat there hand in hand, not looking at each other, just listening to the radio. Sterling felt like the song went on for an eternity, whilst also seeming to go by too quickly. As soon as the song was over April let go and got back to baking. Sterling sat on the floor a little while longer, before she felt ready enough to join in again.


	6. Part six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote two chapters today, just in case you got confused and thought you had missed one.

The rest of the afternoon and evening was filled with mostly proving and baking the bread. The girls had gotten into a good routine and were already on their last loaf when Sterling’s mum came back.

-Oh, you girls are cooking up a storm. And my, it’s so lovely to see you again April- At this, she went over and pinched April’s cheek. Sterling felt like dying from embarrassment. –Hi Sterling. – The greeting came out all stiff and awkward. Sterling didn’t reply. 

-Now April, I just got off the phone with your father. - Even if she did notice how both girl’s stiffened at the mention of April’s dad, she called no attention to it. – He wanted me to tell you that he and your mother are currently having a bit of a misunderstanding between each other, so it might be best if you stay the night here.  
There was a deathly silence from both of the girls, neither showed any expression.

\- And I obviously told him you are welcome here anytime. Plus it might do Sterling some good as well. Cheer her up a bit. 

-Mum!

-What? A girl’s sleepover like old times? Might be nice, watch a movie, talk about boys you like and all that.

April looked like the rug had just been pulled out from underneath her- but Mrs Wesley, I don’t have any of my things. 

-Oh, I’m sure Sterling can provide you with something. How about this, whilst you girl’s clear up here, I go put the spare mattress in Sterling’s room, ready for you when it’s time for bed. – At this Sterling’s mum went upstairs. 

\- I.. I guess I’m staying the night then.

\- I’m so sorry your dad did that to you. If you feel uncomfortable, I can totally ask Blair to sleep in my room with me, and you can have her room. I know you think she hates you, but she’ll understand. 

-No, no it’s ok. I don’t need another reason for her to despise me. Plus we can handle one night, It’s just like old times, right? - At this, she looked up at Sterling, worry written all across her face.

-Yeah, one night. Won’t be hard. Just like old times.

April seemed out of it, her eyes glossed over when she mumbled – it’s just a sleepover, a sleepover where we talk about boys. 

They spent the rest of their baking and cleaning up in silence, slightly dreading what was to come. It was one thing being alone together during the day, but during the night, things were about to get a whole lot more complicated. 

After finishing clearing up they went upstairs and Sterling found some clothes for April to wear as well as a spare toothbrush. When April came back from the bathroom after having changed, Sterling did not expect the sudden jolt it did to her heart to see April in her clothes. 

-You look good.

-Oh haha, mock me all you want, it’s your own terrible fashion sense. 

-No, I meant it serious…. You know what, never mind. Ummm.. Now what? Do we watch a movie?

\- I don’t know, I’m quite tired after today.

\- Oh yeah, totally, me too.

April laid down on the floor mattress. Sterling was left in the weird position of sitting on the bed looking over her.

-Sterl?

-Yeah?

-What’s going on with you and your mum?... I mean you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But if I can help in any way I -

-Well for starters turns out she’s not actually my mum.

April suddenly sat bolt upright – What? – With anyone else who could have told her something like that, she would have doubted them. But she knew how much Sterling hated lying, and she would have no reason to not tell the truth. 

-Yeah turns out she has an identical twin, who abducted me by the way, but that twin is my real mum, and Blair isn’t...- she couldn’t finish the sentence. After taking a deep breath she kept going – she’s not my twin sister, she’s my cousin. 

Sterling felt like a damn that had just been broken, everything started gushing out. As she was explaining what had happened, April sat up onto the bed next to Sterling, hand on thigh listening intently. As soon as Sterling couldn’t hold herself together anymore and the tears started pouring, April wrapped her into a tight embrace, stroking her hair and rubbing her back. She whispered to her, whilst Sterling buried her face in April’s neck. 

-Oh Sterl, I am so sorry. I know it must feel like you have lost a family, but they are still there, they are still your family. Blair is still your sister. Maybe not biologically speaking, but you have lived your lives together as sisters – She gently pushes Sterling out so she can look into her eyes. –So you are still sisters.   
As if on cue, there was a knock on the door and Blair entered without waiting for a reply. – Hey, you’ll never guess what ha- She stopped dead in her track. – April?!  
Sterling quickly wiped away her tears. – Yeah her dad kind of didn’t give her a choice but to stay the night here, so be nice.- Blair didn’t respond, which for April’s standards was her being nice. 

-Oookay, are you alright?

\- Yeah, was just explaining what had happened, that’s all, nothing new. Are you ok?

-Yeah, yeah, well as long as you are ok, if you need anything let me know. And I can tell you about what happened tonight whenever I see you tomorrow. Love you, night.

-Love you too- at this Blair smiled sadly and closed the door. 

April suddenly breathed out as if she had been holding her breath the entire time. -She didn’t throw me out of the window, so I guess that’s progress, she likes me now.

-Yeah next thing you know you’ll be sitting on her bed, consoling her tears. - They both laughed.

-But thanks for telling me about your family, I know how hard it is to talk about that kind of thing. I’m sorry if I forced it out of you.

-No, no. It’s ok. Its nice telling someone outside of the family, who isn’t as wrapped into all of it.

-I smell like you. – Sterling looked confused at the sudden topic change. April picked at the t-shirt she was wearing. 

-Really? Because I can definitely smell you.

-Aww thanks, are you saying I need to shower?

-No,-

-I know, I was just poking fun – April’s eyes were so gentle looking.

-I can smell your hair.-As soon as Sterling said it she instantly regretted it. 

-No Dorito this time? –Sterling was grateful for April’s save.

-Yeah just full Mexican restaurant in there, I think there’s a burrito tucked behind your ear. – At this Sterling as part of the bit reached out behind April’s ear, but the other girl flinched, and Sterling retracted her hand and apologised.

-Sorry

-No, I’m sorry.

April put her head in her hands. – How are we going to survive tonight?

-We could use it as an opportunity, there’s no one in this room who could potentially tell on us.

-I can’t say goodbye again, it’s too hard. 

At this Sterling replied in a dejected tone. – Yeah, I don’t think I can be told goodbye to again either.

-I’m sorry I put you through that. -April looked down.

-Ok, hear me out. How about we just cuddle, you know as friends do, no kissing. Just good old fashioned Christian cuddling.

-Not a thing.

-Well, we can always be pioneers. 

April looked so tired. She got onto her own mattress. And turned away from Sterling.

-Goodnight Sterl.

Sterling turned off the light.

-Sleep tight Apri. 

-Don’t make Apri a thing, it’s not a thing.

-Ok, goodnight Ape.

-You somehow made it worse.

Sterling looked up at the ceiling.-I always do.


	7. Part seven

Sterling just started to drift off to sleep, when she heard the faintest:

-Are you still awake?

-Yeah, why? - mumbled Sterling.

-Can you move your arm?

Sterling was too drowsy to fully understand the request.

-Huh?

-Can you please move your arm it’s … distracting. – Sterling was lying stomach down while her arm was hanging off the edge of her bed. 

-Distracting?- Asked Sterling as she moved her arm.

-I couldn’t sleep, all I could think about was touching it. - Suddenly Sterling was wide awake.

-Oh, I mean you can do that if you want to - She let her hand hang off the side again. It stayed there for a few moments until Sterling felt something brush against her fingers, she flinched instinctually.

-Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. – April sounded so dejected, her voice barely audible in the silence. 

-No, it’s ok. How about now- Sterling moved her positioning further to the edge of the side of the bed so that she could just about see April in the dark. She saw April’s hand move this time and managed not to flinch when it touched hers. April’s hand was slowly working around Sterling’s as if trying to memorise the feel of every line. Sterling knew it sounded awkward, but she couldn’t help but say –Your hands are so soft. 

April chuckled. – I like your hands too. They’re surprisingly elegant.

Sterling was grinning – Of course, you had to throw in the “surprising”, couldn’t let me just have that one could you.

-Surprise is good. You surprise me in lots of ways Sterling Wesley.

If Sterling thought that it was difficult when April called her “Sterl” she now realised that paled in comparison to hearing her full name on April’s lips. 

-I surprise you?

-Yeah, you do actually. - Suddenly April was kneeling next to the bed.

-Do you want to come up here? - Sterling patted the space next to her.

-You really think that’s a good idea?

-If you don’t, I might have to join you on the floor. Although actually, how about you stay creepily kneeling at the edge of my bed, and I’ll just go to sleep whilst you stare at me. That works too.

-Fine, scooch over.

-Really?

-Yes, before I change my mind.

Sterling quickly moved up so as to allow room for April, who had already made herself comfortable under the covers. They had left a gap between them, but April had found Sterling's hand again and was holding it as they lay there looking at each other. 

-Can I ask you a question? asked April tentatively. 

-Yes, anything. 

-Why did you kiss me? - Sterling felt like she had just been shot with an electric current.

-What do you mean?

-I’m not sure, never mind forget it.- As April was second-guessing her question she started to move away and remove her hand, but Sterling held onto it, pulling her back.

-I kissed you because I liked you. You started talking about people needing to tell the truth, and I felt like I was going to explode. So I kissed you. - April didn’t say anything for a while.

-Can I ask you another question?

-Only if I then get to ask you one.

-Deal.

-Ok go ahead.

-When did you know? 

-Know what?

\- Don’t make this harder for me, you know what. When did you know that you.. umm wanted to kiss me? That the idea crossed your mind.

Sterling felt her whole body go red and numb, she was relieved that it was too dark for April to see how flushed she must have looked.

-Oh, I definitely can’t tell you that, it’s too embarrassing.

-Embarrassing? – As April was asking she was edging closer to Sterling. 

-Yeah, there’s no way in hell I am telling you that.

-You won’t get a chance to ask me a question back in return. –April teased Sterling. 

\- I’m okay with that.

-Really? You find it that mortifying? Was it when I had the Dorito in my hair? That snack really did it for you huh?

-I was actually already into you then.

-Really? Because I was trying to trace when I had noticed a shift in your behaviour, and yeah it was around the Solomon’s temple time. Although you were already acting strange at the debate an-

-Please stop.

-Ooh am I close? Was it at the debate? Did my kayaking and swimming to shore story awaken something deep within you? - As April said the word “deep” she grabbed Sterling’s upper arm. That was the last straw for Sterling.

Either to stop herself from screaming or to shut April up, she climbed on top of April and bent down to whisper in her ear.

-If you don’t drop this topic right now, I will hurt you, either emotionally or physically, I’m not sure yet. But you will be hurt

Unfortunately, the reaction this got from April was for her to get that mischievous look in her eye, which could only mean bad things for Sterling. She quickly found out what those bad things were. April flipped her over onto her back and grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her, whilst April held her there, straddled on top of her, she whispered back in the blonde’s ear.

-I really wouldn’t advise you to make those kinds of threats to me. - At this she sat back up, looking down on Sterling. - Honey. - The air seemed to be crackling between them. Sterling was worried where this would go if she didn’t back down.

-Okay, fine, you win. You can let go now, even if you do play dirty. – April clambered off of Sterling’s hips, but this time when lying back down, instead of leaving a gap between them she snuggled up to Sterling, placing her face at about Sterling’s neck, wrapping her legs around Sterling. As April spoke Sterling could feel her voice vibrations against her own neck. It made her toes all tingly.

-Well, you’re the one who started it. 

-Actually you did, with your questions.

\- That’s a good point. You should take up debating, you’d be really good at it. - Both girls laughed. It was one thing to hear each other’s laughs, but both girls were in awe at what it was like to actually feel each other laugh with their bodies so entangled. 

-Good night Sterl.

-Good night April, and for real this time. Don’t go waking me up about some stray arm. 

-Sure.

-Promise?

-Promise.

They finally fell asleep, in an embrace, each heartbeat feeding off the other.


	8. Part eight

The morning alarm woke both of them up. Sterling reached over April to turn it off. She stroked April’s hair.

-Time to get up. – April shook her head in reply, still nestled into Sterling.

-Come on, it’s a big day of feasting and dining and completely ignoring the actual significance of what the last supper means. - No reaction. April was so comfortably cuddling into Sterling that Sterling couldn’t help but resist giving a few quick pecks to the top of April’s head as well as her forehead. This seemed to have a better result in waking April up. Slowly and seemingly painstakingly April opened her eyes, Sterling couldn’t believe how adorable April looked, all bedraggled and angry at the world.

April looked up at Sterling and groaned. -Ugh, why do you look perfect?

-Do I? Oh my gosh, I love morning April, she gives me compliments.

-She can also give you a black eye if you’re not careful.

-Yeah, you’re really intimidating all snuggled up like that.

The best April’s morning brain could come up with for a comeback was a quick harrumph and cuddling into Sterling more, not that Sterling minded of course. Sterling savoured the moment, she felt so much warmth flow through her veins.

-April?

-Hmmm?

-Can I kiss you?

April looked at Sterling and for a moment her eyes lingered on her lips, but then she sighed and looked away. -We said we wouldn’t.

-I know, but-

-Plus morning breath.

-I mean I can brush my teeth, or have a mint or something, that’s definitely a fixable issue.

-Sterl.

-Ok, fine.

There was a pause. Then April started leaving little kisses along Sterling’s neck. The best Sterling could do in terms of a question was a small – but?

April lent up onto her forearms and looked down at Sterling. Even with messy bed hair and her eyes not fully awake, Sterling thought she had never seen someone look so beautiful in her life. 

-I won’t kiss you on the lips. - Then with every word she placed soft kisses on Sterling’s cheeks, forehead, nose, anywhere but her lips. - That. Way. The. Kisses. Don’t. Mean. Anything. 

After she was done, Sterling rolled over and screamed into her pillow, when she rolled back April was looking at her with a look she couldn’t quite decipher. 

-What?

-Sorry, sometimes I still can’t wrap my head around the idea that I have some kind of effect on you.

-More than you could know.

-Clearly, that was quite some silent scream.

-Shut up- April grinned back they lay there for a bit. But then it seemed like April suddenly remembered the weight of the world and all her responsibilities came back to her, this time it was her who thumped her face into a pillow. As April was seemingly trying to self-suffocate, there was a knock from Blair, who this time made extra sure she heard a reply before entering.

-I was just checking you were awake and that one of you hadn’t murdered the other in their sleep. – at this, she stared pointedly at April, who smiled mockingly back.  
Sterling interjected the staring contest before a fight broke out. –Yeah, thanks. All good and alive here. – Blair left at that. The two girls started getting out of bed. April was a lot slower. She was sitting up on the edge of the bed when she cocked her head and looked up at Sterling who was already pacing around the room.

\- I just remembered, I actually did threaten to murder you in your sleep.

-You did?

-Yeah, yesterday, when you dared to call me vertically challenged.

-Oh yeah, you did. Well, you’re a lousy killer. Even Blair and I wouldn’t arrest you.

-Why would you two arrest me?

-Oh, ummm, no reason, just was saying, umm, yeah- Sterling desperately racked her brain for a change of subject. She looked at April who was still wearing her clothes. 

-I think grey suits you.

-You think the blandest colour there is, suits me?

Sterling smiled. – Yes, I do. 

-Thanks, I guess.

April got up and picked up her clothes, ready to go to the bathroom and change. 

-You can borrow clothes for today if you want. And some.. ummm, underwear. I’m sorry, I don’t know why I said that.

April tried to sound as unfazed by the suggestion as possible. She went into the en suite and spoke through the door whilst changing. –No it’s ok. I’ll wear my clothes for now and then either get one of my parents to quickly pick me up or uber home to change there, they can’t keep me out of our house forever. And then I should just about be able to get to school on time. 

-Oh I’m sure we can drop you off if you want. 

-No, don’t worry about it. – April left the bathroom and picked up her phone to sort out her ride. After she was done, both girls went into the bathroom to brush their teeth.  
Whilst brushing the girls seemed to go into a trance-like state of locking eyes with each other in the bathroom mirror’s reflection. After they had both finished, Sterling quipped -Would you look at that, we’ve both brushed our teeth, morning breath gone.

April rolled her eyes. She checked her phone. 

-The uber will be here any minute. I gotta go.- she started collecting all of her belongings. 

-So soon?

April finished and cupped Sterling’s cheek, smiling at her. She then lent in and kissed the cheek her hand had touched.-I’ll see you later.

As the door closed behind her, Sterling heard April yell at her to not forget the bread.


	9. Part nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it isn't a very fluffy chapter, and more plotty. But plot helps get to the soppy stuff sometimes :)

The banquet was happening during the third period. Sterling hadn’t seen April since the rushed morning. What she didn’t expect to see when walking into the hall where they were preparing the feast, in amongst the group of parents, students and teachers gathered, was April’s dad. Yet there he was, glaring right at her. Sterling had never wanted Blair by her side more in her life. As she went over to place the bread on the table, he walked over to her.

-Hello Sterling.

-Hi Mr Stevens. What brings you to this lovely event?

-I think you know exactly what.

-It’s the cheese platter isn’t it? I always knew you were a stilton man. 

-Stop fooling around. –Sterling gulped. 

-I came to let you know that from now on, your life is going to be a living hell, I will personally make sure of it.

-Oh that’s sweet, but you really don’t have to, I-

-Unless.- He paused dramatically.- you and your sister meet me at our estate at midnight. Sharp. There are a few things I would like to discuss with you two cu-  
Before he could finish his colourful use of the English language, a –Hi Daddy- stopped him in his tracks. April appeared smiling at both, albeit looking a little confused. 

-I didn’t think you would actually turn up. You usually tend to avoid my school events.

April’s dad instantly changed his expression, to one of such sickly admiration that Sterling felt queasy.

-How could I miss it? All morning you were describing the bread you made with Sterling, I couldn’t wait to take a bite out of it – at the word bite he snapped his jaw and eyed Sterling, but April didn’t quite catch it as she was too busy rearranging the bread display. 

-Really?-her whole face lit up- I would recommend the Focaccia, the recipe we found for it was amazing, we translated it from Italian.

Then Ellen hit her fork against a glass to get everyone’s attention. Mr Steven’s lent over to April’s ear and quietly said. – Actually, I just remembered, there was a business call I had to make, I have to go. I’ll see you this evening.

As he left, Sterling noticed that for a brief moment April looked like she’d just been deflated, but she quickly regained herself as if nothing had happened. Sterling felt a pang for April in how abandoned she must have felt, but it was the speed at which April hid that, clearly from experience, that really pulled at her heartstrings. She nudged April and tried to give a comforting smile. But it was to no avail, April stared onwards with a stone expression, pretending to be listening intently to Ellen’s speech. 

-And that’s why I to this day will not go within five yards of a pot of humus. – The crowd laughed at Ellen’s anecdote, Sterling pretended to join in. Even though she had no idea what the rest of the tale had been about. This rewarded her with a side look from April. – No, but in all honesty, I’d like to thank y’all for joining us for this celebration. The students worked very hard on this all week, some more than others. I’m sure we’re gonna have a lovely afternoon. But enough chit chat, let’s tuck in and keep our fingers crossed for no food poisoning. – At that the crowd started gathering around the table, plates in hand, picking and choosing.

-Are we really all just ignoring what the last supper actually signified?-April muttered.

-I think it was just an elaborate ploy for Ellen to eat something besides those fig newton bars.

To Sterling’s delight, April smirked at her quip, which was good, it meant progress in cheering her up. 

-Who here do you think is going to get brutally murdered? – Asked April as she started putting food on her plate.

-What?!?

-It’s the last supper. 

-Oh, umm.. Honestly I think I might tonight. – Sterling realised what she had just said, and prayed April didn’t ask further questions. 

\- I’ll make sure you get a better memorial than the one you gave Mr Kitz.

-Mr Koontz, - Sterling corrected - and thanks. – Sterling thought she had gotten away with it when April asked. 

-Why do you think you’ll get murdered tonight?

-Well.. I watched the Ring last night, and you know what they say about watching the Ring? You’ll.. umm get murdered the next night. 

-I was with you the entire night?

-Yes you were, yes.. you.. were. It must have been a dream then. 

They’d finished gathering their plates and sat outside on the grass. Partly because she wanted to change the subject from her potential murder and partly because she genuinely wanted to know, Sterling asked. 

-Talking of last night, how do you feel?

-How do I feel?

-Yeah, do you regret any of it? Or do you feel ok, it wasn’t too much.

\- You didn’t force me into anything. 

-No I know, I mean I didn’t know, but glad to hear, I just wanted to check.

April seemed to lose part of her stone exterior she had been keeping up and became softer. 

-Well, thanks for checking you’re very sweet –Sterling’s heart skipped. – And last night was lovely, but we obviously can’t repeat it. –this time Sterling’s heart sunk.  
April saw Sterling’s face drop. –Oh please don’t look at me like that, we both agreed we wouldn’t. Otherwise if we stop, no not if, when we stop it’ll be sad, like it is now. Like imagine if we had kissed, do you know much it would have sucked to have to stop again.

-I don’t know I feel pretty sad right now. 

April placed her hand on Sterling’s knee, stroking it with her thumb. – I know, I do too. But it’s for the best. 

-Your best.

-Please, let’s not do this right now. Ezekiel and Hannah. B. are coming towards us. Let’s just enjoy the food we made and then pretend that we enjoy other people’s cooking. - Which is exactly what they did for the rest of the period.


	10. Part ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I was gonna break these into separate chapters as I got a bit carried away tonight. But I kind of like it as one long chapter. So sorry in advance, this one is a loooong one.

That night Blair and Sterling rolled up to the Stevens’ estate, both riddled with nerves. 

-You brought the pistol again?- Stage whispered Blair as they got out of the car.

-It worked last time, didn’t it?

-Last time he didn’t know we were bounty hunters. This time we won’t have that luxury. 

They both looked up at the mansion. 

-Where did he tell you to meet us?

-He just said to be at the estate.

-So what? We just roam around a bit, play “what’s behind that door?”, is it your girlfriend or our killer. 

-A, don’t call her my girlfriend, you know that’s a sore subject, and B, he might not be our killer, maybe he had a change of heart and now loves and respects women and finds our fierce independence admirable? 

The girls spotted a torch flashing in amongst the trees across the lawn.

-I take that back, he’s definitely about to kill us. 

The girls walked tentatively over to the flashing light. Where sat John Stevens. 

-Hello ladies, care to join me- at that, he pointed at the two deck chairs facing his. 

-Not particularly, but sure. –Said Sterling as they sat down. 

\- I’ll keep this short, I don’t want to see your disgusting faces any longer than I have to. –Blair muttered something about thinking hers was quite lovely thank you very much- You have two choices. Either you help me frame your own dad as a drug mogul, that way the town’s heat will ease a bit from me, plus there’s the added bonus of you two getting a taste on how this type of situation affects a family. 

-Oh, we can’t do that. – said Blair. 

-Yeah, our family is already dealing with a lot, I don’t know if it would survive this too. 

-Oh so you’ve opted for option 2 then, how nice, I was hoping you would. See, we have a lovely garden, but it desperately needs some new fertiliser, I’m sure you girls wouldn’t mind providing the nutrients.- At this, he made a signal and suddenly the girls were thrust into darkness as bags were placed over their heads and their hands were tied.  
Sterling just managed to shout out Bowser’s name before a hand covered her mouth through the bag. 

Even though they couldn’t see anything, they heard men shouting all around them, punches were clearly being thrown. And then a few shots went off and the girls started screaming. Suddenly they were thrown back into the world of the seeing when the bags were removed and Bowser and Terrance stood there. Three handcuffed men lay groaning on the ground, one of whom was April’s dad. 

-Did you remember to tape it? – asked Blair.

-A simple thank you would be nice.- said Bowser. 

-I’m sorry, thank you so much for saving our asses, I have never been happier to see your beautiful faces, especially you Bowser. Did you remember to tape it?

-That was better, and yes, of course, we did, just like you asked. 

-Are the cops going to come? –Asked Sterling.

-No, I think it’s too remote out here, which is probably why he chose it in the first place.-said Terrance. 

-That and it being his property.

-Yeah, that too. 

Sterling felt something warm drip down her leg.-Guys! I’m bleeding.

-Shit Sterling, why didn’t you say something earlier. How bad is it? – Said Blair panicked whilst Bowser rushed over to inspect the wound.

-I don’t know, adrenaline? 

-It looks like a stray bullet must have chipped you. –Said Bowser- You lucky, it could have been a lot worse

-You can’t take me to the hospital, my mum’s gonna kill us? And I don’t think our parents need any more worries in their life right now.

Blair agreed. -She’ll say we were “partaking in reckless behaviour”. 

-Which you were.

-Guys, I hate to interrupt your bickering, but can you stop me from bleeding out to my death.

Terrance shook his head – You’ll be fine, as long as you treat it sooner rather than later. I’ll take these three down to the precinct, and you go in the house and wash it out and apply some pressure to it and it’ll be good as new, I promise. – At that, he carried two of the men over each shoulder and the third bridal style back to his car.

-I should really work out more- muttered Bowser. 

Sterling limped over to the mansion using Blair as a crutch. When they got up the stairs to the door, Sterling suddenly paused.

-Isn’t this technically breaking and entering?

-I’d rather we got in trouble for that than you get some infection. Plus I’m sure April will cover for us.

-Oh gosh, April, 

-Just get inside. 

When they stepped inside April appeared around the corner screaming with a baseball bat in hand. She dropped it as soon as she saw who was in the hallway.

-Sterling? Blair? -she looked around.- Man I have never met before in my life?

-What were you planning to do with that?- asked Bowser as he nudged the baseball bat.

-Hi April, a lot to explain, but Sterling needs help. Basically can we please use a bathroom and a first aid kit. 

April saw the blood and almost in a trance led them to a bathroom and then went to fetch a first aid kit. When she came back she looked paler than Sterling, who felt like she was about to pass out, though didn’t let the others know that. 

-Does anyone here actually know how to do first aid?- asked Blair.

A small - I do- came from April. She cleared her throat – though you two should leave, otherwise it’s too cramped in here and you’ll distract me. 

-This isn’t an ER.

April was starting to raise her voice. –Leave. 

Blair bit back- I am not leaving my sister. 

April was livid. –You just brought a strange man and a bleeding Sterling into my home in the middle the night, you will do as I say. 

Sterling looked at Blair with a pleading stare – I’ll be fine, go. – Blair huffed and stormed off, Bowser followed suit. 

April gently took Sterling’s leg and examined the wound. Sterling was about to speak, but April shushed her and told her – Not yet. - She reached over Sterling to take off the showerhead in above the bath and turned on the water to a small trickle. She checked the temperature with her wrist. Then she stepped into the bath and asked Sterling to turn as well to face her. 

-This should be the right temperature- she started to rinse the wound for a few minutes. Sterling had never seen her act so gentle before. 

April turned off the shower and got out of the bath to open the first aid kit. She got out a cloth a dabbed the wound, the blood was already coming out at a lot slower rate.

-What did this? - whispered April. 

-A stray bullet. – April looked like she had just been the one who had been shot.

-This is why I should have waited for questions till after finishing patching you up. So no more answers till after I am done. Deal?

-Deal. 

-Ok, this next part is going to sting a bit, I’m sorry. – April looked like she really didn’t want to apply the dressing, so as not to cause any more harm to Sterling, but she put it on anyway. Sterling winced, and April quickly looked up to see if Sterling was ok. Sterling smiled to reassure her. April finished putting the bandages on, placed a small kiss on Sterling’s knee and sighed. 

She stood up and looked at Sterling with such care and worry that Sterling felt like she should have had a worse injury worthy of such concern. 

-Is the rest of you ok?

-Yes, physically, I believe so.

April tightly hugged Sterling. It was a little awkward due to positioning, but Sterling appreciated it nonetheless. 

-Ok, so now come the questions. 

-Can I ask you one first?

-Really? You’re in the position to do that? – But then April softened her tone. – Yes, you can ask. 

-Where’s your mum?

-Oh, she tends not to sleep here now that dad’s back. 

-He might be gone again. – April’s face went unnaturally still. 

-What do you mean?

-He just got arrested again, that’s what this is about. –she pointed at her leg. 

April looked like she was about to throw up. 

-I’ll explain from the beginning, just promise me you will let me finish. 

April didn’t answer, but Sterling took it as the closest she was going to get to a yes as she could. Then Sterling explained everything from the beginning. There were moments where April’s face turned practically purple from boiling emotions. But almost miraculously she stayed silent throughout the whole thing. After Sterling had finished explaining everything, April was quiet for a couple of minutes, trying to process everything and keep her sanity in check. Finally she broke the silence.

-That was so stupid of you to go tonight.

-We told Bowser and Terrance where we would be to help save us if things went south.

-I don’t know who the fuck they are, What if he had just shot you then and there? Would have they jumped out and stopped the bullet. 

-Ok yes, I’m sorry, it was stupid. You don’t need to debate me about it. I know that now. 

April took in some deep breaths and carried on.-I’m just glad you’re ok.

-You are?

-What kind of question is that?

-I don’t know, I thought you might hate us, hate me, after you found out that we were the ones who arrested him in the first place. Well and now. 

-He just tried to kill you. That’s all I can think about right now. Maybe later it’ll settle and I’ll hate you for it, but right now everything is a seething white light of panic at the thought that he could have killed you. –April was clearly getting worked up, Sterling sat down on the floor next to April and put her arm around her. They sat there for a moment, April’s head on Sterling’s shoulder before April started speaking again.

-He doesn’t deserve me carings. But it sucks, to me he is still my daddy -she choked up- he’s still the dad who I would marathon movies with, or go on exciting trips with, or who would read me bedtime stories…. I hate him as a person, but I love him as a dad. – at the last statement, April turned away, trying to calm herself down.

Sterling rubbed April’s back -You can hate him and still love the memories you two made. You don’t have to lose the love you have if anything you should nurture it. It needs your protection, otherwise all those happy memories could turn to hate. – April smiled sadly at that. But then her face got solemn again. 

-I’m scared I’ll become like him. 

-What someone who beats up women, I doubt it.

-You say that, but I grabbed your arm. I mean usually, I just psychologically tortured you, but physically? I crossed a line. And I’m so scared I’ll cross it again.

-What are you talking about?

-At the debate, after you bailed out of winning, I grabbed your arm. I couldn’t believe what I had done, that’s why I left.

Sterling felt her stomach, heart and the rest of her insides backflip. - Oh that time, umm, yeah you really don’t have to worry about that. Plus grabbing an arm definitely does not equate to beating someone up or trying to kill someone. 

But April still looked so upset at the thought, that Sterling knew there was only one thing she could say to get her out of it. 

-That was when I knew.

April looked at Sterling, confused. Sterling felt her face go crimson, but she pushed through. 

-Umm, that was when I knew that I umm wanted to kiss you and maybe more. 

-Stop joking. 

-I’m not, I kind of wish I was. Actually no I don’t, it’s now part of my self-discovery journey. But umm yeah.

-You’re being serious?

-Kinda.

-That was when you knew? When I was yelling at you?

-And when you grabbed my arm. 

-Why?

-I wish I knew. I don’t know, something just sort of clicked like I found what made me tick. 

April stared at Sterling, mouth slightly aghast. 

-Please don’t tease me for it, I know, it’s strange, I yeah-

-No, no. I won’t tease, actually, I might. I haven’t decided yet.

-I’m sorry if that weirded you out. 

-No, I’m just trying to process my emotions, it’s definitely a mix, I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel. 

-Maybe ignore the supposed to. How does it actually make you feel? 

-Like this.- At that April grabbed Sterling’s face and kissed her on the lips. April didn’t know how else to convey how much it meant to her that Sterling never seemed to judge her for her emotions. And that even when she was at her most “intense” or her lowest, Sterling still wanted her, she never shied away. She always looked directly at the flame that was burning within her and welcomed it with open arms. As they kissed, Sterling felt hot tears on her lips, but they weren’t her own. She pulled away and glanced at April who was looking down, tears streaming down her face. 

-I’m sorry I-

-It’s ok, I know- Sterling said quietly. She kissed April’s closed eyes and then followed the trail of tears leaving little kisses as she went, until she placed a long gentle kiss on her lips. 

-I’m glad you’re ok- whispered April.

-I’m glad too. 

Blair's knocking at the door broke the spell.


	11. Part eleven

Blair came into the bathroom.

-Has the bleeding stopped?

Sterling, still on the floor next to April, smiled up.

-At least for a bit. April did a really good job.

Blair turned her attention to April. -How do you know first aid? Or will I regret asking?

-Oh, I took a course in Zambia when I was helping in the “wells and bibles for orphans who can’t smell” project.

-I regret asking. 

-That’s quite the mouthful- pointed out Sterling.

Blair helped the two girls up and they went back into the hallway. Sterling hugged Bowser as soon as she saw him standing there.

-I didn’t get to thank you properly, on account of the whole bleeding leg situation. But I’m so proud and grateful of you to have put your pride away for a bit to be there for us with Terrance.

-Some things are more important than pride. 

Blair pinched his cheeks –Oh aren’t we a softie, I knew you cared.

-Watch it. Shall we head back?

April looked nervous-You.. you can stay if you want to.

Sterling replied-No, it’s ok we should really get going. Mum and dad would freak if they find that we aren’t in bed or something. They might worry we got kidnapped again.   
-“We” didn’t get kidnapped, it was just you. -said Blair.

-Yeah, but I felt you were there with me the whole time.

-Awww, that’s disturbing but sweet.-Blair started walking to the car, but could still be heard saying.- How come you get all the cool action hero moments, kidnapped, being shot at-

-You also got to kiss the hot girl. –Said April, keeping her voice down out of earshot of Blair, but Sterling whipped her head around when she heard her.

She gave a quick peck on April’s cheek and smiled. –See you soon? - April nodded, and Sterling went on her way back home. 

Over the weekend, Sterling didn’t hear from April. But she understood as she was probably dealing with the whole dad on trial again situation. But the moment she set foot on school grounds a voice came from behind her, which made Sterling jump a bit from surprise and turn around.

-Is the wound healing up ok?

-Yes, I got expert medical attention. –April and Sterling walked side by side down the path towards the main building.

-Really? Did you end up going to the hospital?

-No, I meant you. 

-Oh right, sorry, I’m not fully with it today. 

-Yeah, no. I understand, - Sterling lowered her voice.- How is it with your dad. 

-Well, I lost it at him in the precinct, yelling and screaming to the point that I had to be escorted out. So really well, couldn’t be better.

-I wish you didn’t have to go through this again. 

-Yeah, well I’d rather this than the alternative. – April glanced at Sterling’s leg, noticing the slightest of limps. –Anyways, this is my class, I’ll see you fourth period in Spanish.

-Si.

-Adiós, Carolina. –April really made sure she rolled her r just long enough to get the reaction she wanted from Sterling, and then went into her classroom. 

During the fourth period, the class was divided into different groups to discuss Don Quixote. Even though Sterling and April were in different groups they were keenly aware of each other from across the room. Whenever Sterling started to talk she could feel April’s eyes on her. Sterling didn’t understand how, but even in a loud classroom, as soon as April started speaking to her group, Sterling could instantly pick out her voice and would watch her mannerisms when speaking. Until Blair who was sitting next to her would nudge her, or gently cough to try and get her attention. 

To try and clear her head a bit, Sterling excused herself to go to the bathroom. But as soon as she entered the door swung again behind her. It was April. 

\- We have to stop meeting like this.

Sterling couldn’t help but smile. –You’re the one that followed me. 

April took Sterling’s hand and started leading her out of the door. –Come, - she checked the corridors were clear- we can have a change of scenery. –she said as she led Sterling into a janitor’s closet. 

‘Oh fudge’ thought Sterling. It’s ‘THE janitor’s closet. And April is now in here too’. Sterling’s brain started working on about half capacity. She sat on a table, whilst April put her arms either side of her, leaning on it. With April so close in front of her, Sterling had gone down to fifteen per cent capacity. 

April spoke, her voice practically a purr- You kept looking at me in class.

Sterling gulped. – You were looking too.

-Maybe. 

-I like the way your lips move when you talk, and your hands-

April kissed her, this time the kiss was less soft and more passionate, both taking short breaths for air, hands exploring. Then Sterling by mistake let slip a moan, and April stopped, her eyes looked dark searching Sterling’s face.

-What?- asked Sterling, desperate for them to carry on.

-I just didn’t expect that. 

-I can make sure I don’t do it again.

-No, - April leaned in- I want you to do it again. 

They kissed again and this time Sterling didn’t hold back. Just before she thought she was going to have a repeat of her previous janitor’s closet experience. April broke it off, expression panicked. 

-Class! We were gone way longer than we should have. What’s our excuse?

-I don’t know, I’m not really a slacking type.

-Well if you hadn’t noticed, neither am I. 

-Let’s just go back and improvise if anyone asks. 

But they needn’t have worried, as no one even noticed they had been gone that long, apart from Blair who raised an eyebrow at Sterling and flatted her hair a bit.


	12. Part twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as a little warning, sorry in advance. but I might start posting a bit less regularly, as I'm back to work, and need sleep, but you guys have been wonderful to me and this fic, the first I have ever written, it really touched my heart. Thank you and now enjoy

The rest of the school day went as normal. But that evening when Sterling was getting ready for bed, she got a text from April asking her if it was ok if she slept over. Sterling replied that it was and asked how long it would take to get here, April quickly replied that she was already outside the front door. Sterling rushed downstairs as quietly as she could. She opened the door and there stood April, two bags in hand.

\- Was that too creepy?

-No, it was sweet. Though kind of creepy too. –Sterling led April by the hand back into her room and softly closed the bedroom door. 

-Thanks, Sterl, I just couldn’t be in that big empty house on my own. Mum’s still at the hotel, said she needed some alone time. 

Sterling embraced April into a hug- It’s ok, I’m glad you reached out. Albeit kind of surprised. At least you came prepared this time. –Sterling pointed out the two jam-packed bags that April had brought.

-What? I have a nine-step skin-care routine. 

-Of course, you do. 

They both sat down on the bed. Not really sure what to do with themselves. 

Sterling had an idea. –We could play sleepover games to take your mind off things.

-What are we 12? - Sterling looked dejected. April sighed.

-Ok fine, list some, and I’ll see which one I don’t hate the sound of.

-Spin the bottle?

-Really? There’s two of us? I’ll end up having to make out with that lamp over there.

-Hide and seek.

-Are you being serious?- At this point April had laid her head on Sterling’s crossed lap, she was looking up at Sterling, whilst Sterling gently stroked her hair, both girls couldn’t help but smile during their mock debate. 

-Pillow fight?

-I’ll knock you out too quickly, unfair advantage.

-I’m taller than you.

-Which means my power is more concentrated, I’m like a spring under pressure. It’s basic physics. 

-Ok fine, how about… 21 questions.

-Hmmmm

-Truth or dare? Come on, you have to be ok with truth or dare.

-Fine. –April sat back up and looked at Sterling with that half-smile. – But I get to go first.

-How come you always get to go first?

-Oh, so you don’t want to play?

-Uugh, fine.

-Truth or dare?

-Umm.. truth. 

-Who's a better kisser, me or Luke?

Sterling dragged out Luke’s name –LLLLuuuu- April gasped and pretended to hit her arm. 

-I’m just kidding, it’s definitely you. As soon as we kissed, poor Luke didn’t stand a chance. It was like all this time I had been stepping on puddles, and then suddenly I was thrust into the ocean. 

April was looking at Sterling so softly. – I know that was cheesy, but I hate that it worked on me. 

Sterling grinned. –Does it deserve a kiss as a reward for such an excellent answer? 

-Fine- April quickly pecked Sterling on the lips. - A plus plus.

-My turn, truth or dare?- asked Sterling. 

-Truth as well.

Sterling, took a moment, too many thoughts racing through her mind. –What went through your head when I first kissed you?

April took a deep breath. – Honestly, I still can’t believe it happened. I kind of blanked out at first in shock. 

-What about after you locked the door?

-I just remember wanting more, it was like as I walked away from you, the colder it got, and you were just so warm. If we are sticking to your water theme, it felt like a dam had been broken.

-Sorry, that sounds like an expensive structure to have been destroyed.

-You won’t believe, the paperwork was a nightmare, - April laughed, but then her voice got more solemn- I had built it up myself, brick by brick. Then it all came crashing down. 

There was a knock on the door, and both girls panicked, but before they could do anything Sterling’s dad came in. 

-Oh, April, I didn’t expect you here, I heard Sterling talking to someone, but I assumed it was Blair.

-Nope, it’s April, she’s uuhhh.. staying the night because of family issues. 

-Also, I don’t feel particularly safe at home, three people broke into our house last night– Sterling shot a warning glance at April. 

-Oh goodness, that sounds awful.

-Yeah, sorry it must have slipped my mind at dinner that she was staying the night, but then I remembered after but was worried you and mum had already gone to bed and didn’t want to disturb you. –Said Sterling. 

-Oh no, it’s fine, and I’m sorry to hear about what’s been happening recently. I’m glad you and Sterling rekindled your friendship, it’s nice that you two can lean on each other with everything that’s been happening. Ok, well I won’t keep you up any longer. Good night girls. –at that, he left. 

Sterling breathed a sigh of relief. – Wow, that is a very different reaction to if he had found Luke in here with me. 

-I guess that’s one benefit of a heteronormative society. Two girls get to “rekindle their friendship” in peace.

-Stop it.

-Really?

-No. Where were we?

-Questions. - April grinned.-And I hadn't gotten a reward for my answer

At that Sterling leaned into April, cupping her face, and through her lips tried to convey how grateful she was that April was being so vulnerable with her, letting her walls down one by one.


	13. Part thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for being patient with me. Hope you enjoy some more of these two x

After some time of kisses, giggles and wandering hands they pulled apart, breathless.

-I can’t, not with my parents and Blair so close by, I keep worrying that one of them will walk in. 

-I know, we should be careful.

They lay side by side on the bed, April tentatively reached over to hold Sterling’s hand. Sterling started to speak.

-So we’ve done truth or dare, what else do girls do during sleepovers, oooh I know, a makeover.

-Not even if there was a gun against my head, no.

-First of all, come on it would be fun. Second of all, ouch too soon.

April realised what she had said, and quickly turned to look at Sterling.

-Oh, I’m so sorry, I completely forgot, I-

-No, no it’s ok,… but you know what would make it up to me.- April groaned and turned back. 

-Sterling, please don’t do this to me. 

-Come on, I was thinking plaits for you, maybe some green sparkly eyeshadow.

-I would like to suggest a compromise.

-The floor is yours.

-I do your makeup, and you don’t even think about plaiting my hair.

-Hmmm…I’ll consider it.

April got up and walked over to the makeup bag on Sterling’s desk.

-You’re done considering - she said as she gestured for Sterling to sit up in bed, whilst April sat down next to her. -So what do you want? An elegant evening look, church ready, a clown?

-Wait, you’re actually doing this?

-It was either that, or you turning me into some kind of Pippi Longstocking so yeah, what do you want?

-Ummm… -Sterling was keenly aware that April was going to be looking at her face very closely.- whatever inspires you. 

-Just warning you, I’ve never been the best with makeup- said April as she started to apply the foundation onto Sterling’s face with a makeup sponge. 

-It’s fine, neither have I. I was never sure what the limit was on how much makeup you could wear before people would think that you are going against God. 

-Exactly. Mothers wear so much makeup and style their hair for hours, but a soon as a teenager does the same, it’s too much and going against your God given natural beauty. It’s all just a patriarchal tool of oppression for women to never feel comfortable in their own skin no matter how much foundation they wear or how old they are. –As April was speaking she was dabbing concealer on, and as she got further in her rant she dabbed it on more and more aggressively. 

-Ow!-Sterling flinched.

-Oh sorry, I got a bit carried away. 

-No, I liked it- April looked puzzled.

Sterling quickly expanded what she meant – No, not the aggressive concealer action, the being ‘carried away’. When you talk about something you care about the passion is tangible. Your thoughts flow so well when you talk. I always stumble over what I’m gonna say next, but with you, it’s like your mind is razor sharp, like a laser, so focused.

-Well if you don’t stop talking so I can actually colour in your eyebrows, not that you really need it, they’re perfect, then maybe I will end up having to use a laser to get you to stop. – April softened- but thanks, I like your mind too. 

They sat for a bit in silence, as April moved from eyebrows to eyeshadow. With her eyes closed, Sterling felt like her other senses were on high alert. She could feel April's hand gently holding onto her face whilst she applied the eye shadow, but more distractingly she could hear April's quiet breathing. 

-Have I ever told you how much I like your eyes? - said April.

Sterling leaned back and opened her eyes, scrutinising April’s face for any sign of mockery. 

-I like how they dart everywhere as if trying to capture everything around them. But what I especially love, -At this April leaned closer, speaking slower- is sometimes when I talk, like now, they don’t dart at all, and that’s when I know, I’ve managed to capture your full undivided attention. – She kissed Sterling, and then pulled away smiling. –That and they are gorgeous. 

Sterling felt like her face was on fire, apart from her lips, which felt numb, April had started to apply lipstick to them which did not help. April was puckering her lips as if to help make Sterling do the same so it was easier to apply the lipstick to them. But the only effect it had was for Sterling to not be able to tear her eyes away from them. Before April could finish applying the lipstick, Sterling felt like she was going to burst if she didn’t say

-I love your lips.

-My lips? Also, stop moving. 

-Yes, your lips, when I look at them too long I get all flushed and flustered. … “You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.”

-Did you just quote the bible to me as a pickup line?

-Depends, did it work?

April kissed Sterling delicately so as not to smudge the makeup. –Perhaps. 

She finished applying the makeup and handed Sterling the mascara.

-I don’t want to poke your eye out, so you can apply it yourself. 

Sterling stood up to go check her look in the mirror.

-Oh, so you ended up with going for Sunday church chic?

-I did say I wasn’t the best. 

Sterling turned around and gave April a reassuring peck on the lips. 

-I really like it, I really do, but it’s time for bed so I’m gonna wipe it all off now. But it’s really good. 

-That was way too many “really’s” for it to be believable. 

Both girls quickly got ready for bed and snuggled up under the blanket. 

-Thanks for letting me crash at yours, you made the evening a lot less miserable than it could have been.

-Yeah, we had a proper sleepover…. Oh, but we forgot to talk about boys. 

Both girls laughed. 

-Maybe next time. – said April.

-Maybe, although I somehow strongly doubt it. - mumbled Sterling as she wrapped her arms around April.


	14. Part fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a shorter one, but you guys have been so sweet, so I still wanted to update.

Sterling nudged April.

-Are you awake? – she whispered.

-Yeah.

-There’s something I want to do with you.

April leaned up and scrutinised Sterling’s face, wondering if she had correctly interpreted what Sterling wanted.

Sterling blushed and laughed. - No not that. Please just trust me, and go along with it. 

April didn’t respond. Waiting for any clue as to what Sterling was talking about. 

-You’re gonna have to get out of bed though.

April pouted. – But it’s warm. 

Sterling got up and reached out her hand to pull April up.

-Come on, for me. 

April rolled her eyes and stood up. 

-Ok now stand here- Sterling lead April to the middle of the floor space. 

-Now you have to close your eyes. 

-What is this? The lights are already off anyways. If you’re trying to recreate a sensory deprivation tank, I can tell you that they do nothing for me. I did one after I tore a ligament during my equestrian class in Lyon, and it just made me crave salt. 

\- I understood about half of that, but no it’s not a autosensingarather tank, at least I don’t think so. 

Sterling got her sleep mask and put it over April’s eyes. 

-This should help.

-Help me get pink eye. 

-You weren’t worried about exchanging bodily fluids with me before.

-Mmmm, nothing sexier than the exchange of bodily fluids. 

-Please just be patient, which I know for you is hard.

April smirked and shot Sterling a look before putting on the sleep mask. –Ooh someone’s feeling feisty tonight. 

Sterling finished setting up everything. She went over to April as soon as she had pressed play on her phone. Slow Burn started playing over the speaker quietly. April reached to remove the eye mask. Sterling quickly stopped her hands. 

-No not yet.

-Really?

-Can we dance?

-Ballet? Tap? An Irish jig?

-April. 

Sterling took April’s hands and wrapped them around her waist and then put her own on April’s shoulders. April felt her senses heighten when she couldn’t see. She pulled Sterling in closer, they started to slowly sway to the music. Both heartbeats racing from all the emotion attached to the song. It felt so overwhelming, every word piercing April.

-Is it not too loud?

-No it should be ok. My bedroom’s the only one on this side of the house, plus the walls are really thick. 

-Wow, thanks for the architectural walkthrough.

-You’re the one who asked.

-Sorry, I d-

Sterling interrupted her.

-Now. It’s about to be the chorus.

-What?

-The eye mask - Sterling gently lifted the mask off of April’ face. April looked around blinking trying to get her eyes to adjust. As it looked like the room was slowly spinning with little fireflies. 

-Did you drug me?

-Ha, no it’s a galaxy night light, I don’t know what they’re called, projector. I got it when I was 12 for Christmas, but it still works. But if you don’t like it, I can turn it off.

-No, - April reached up and kissed Sterling – it’s perfect. You’re perfect. –she smiled. – I mean you have you’re issues and flaws.

– Of course.

April smiled softly and traced Sterling’s collarbone. –But you’re still perfect. 

Sterling beamed down at April, proud of herself. They swayed a bit more, but then April occasionally spun Sterling or herself round, both laughing. But then they went to holding each other closely, moving side to side. After a moment they started to kiss. This cycle lasted for a few more songs, until both girls lay on the floor side by side looking at the lights. 

-This was very special Sterl, although when I blindfold you it will be for very different reasons. 

Sterling nearly chocked. Her voice coming out at a much higher pitch than expected. 

\- “When” you blindfold me? Not an “if” you blindfold me?

April grinned and leaned over kissing Sterling. – Yes when. 

Sterling turned the music off and they crawled back into bed, falling asleep with the lights still dancing around the room.


	15. Part fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, managed to write a slightly longer one. I know I haven't been super consistent. but thanks for the support, it's been really nice and helpful x

After about an hour after April had woken up, during which she had snuggled with Sterling, washed her face, had breakfast, she was slowly becoming human again. When they went back upstairs to Sterling’s room, she got a little twinkle in her eye. 

-Why don’t I try on your clothes?

-No you can’t.

April used a mocking tone. – Because your clothes are too long for me? 

-What? No. Because it would be too much. I could barely handle you wearing my old grey t-shirt for pyjamas. For some reason you wearing my clothes has too much power.

-Oooh, all the more reason to do it and put on a fashion show. – At this April did fake dramatic poses. -You know Daddy took me once to a runway in Milan, I could teach you a thing or two about a catwalk.

-You mean like how to sit and watch women twice your height walk past you. 

-Sterling Wesley, you are on very thin ice. – April paused, whilst Sterling had an internal freak-out about what it did to her when April used her full name. - Although I will admit, I was slightly more focused on the actual women than the clothes, but that’s beside the point. I still learnt some things. 

At this April went into Sterling’s closet and started rummaging around. Sterling sat on the bed waiting and grimaced, wishing she had cleaned the closet more recently than she had. April re-emerged wearing denim dungarees with a white crop top underneath. Sterling couldn’t help but laugh, it was something she never thought she would see April wear. 

-You look so gay.

-Thanks, I’ll take that as a compliment. I look like a builder. 

-You do look a bit like you are in a boyband.

-Yes, that’s it. I look like a boyband member who is pretending to be a builder in their music video.

-So, gay.

-So, gay. 

-I like the crop top on you though.

-Of course, you do. 

April went back in and found a tight black dress to wear, but as soon as Sterling saw her in it, she said.

-Nope take it off, too powerful. 

April grinned and took a ruler from Sterling’s desk and started to hit it against the palm of her hand like a teacher would. 

-You don’t think you deserve to be punished for being a naughty student. 

Sterling felt her blood rush to a very particular part of her body and whimpered.

-April please. – Sterling knew she had to look away before she embarrassed herself more. 

April put the ruler down. -Fine, we’ll put a pin in it. 

After quite some time April emerged wearing a suit. Sterling felt her jaw drop and she was worried she might be dribbling. Admittedly the sleeves and trousers were probably a bit too long for April, but she had improvised and rolled them up, which in Sterling’s mind made the outfit look even better. Sterling couldn’t take her eyes off her, her hair cascading down, but then April looked in the mirror and tied her hair in a low ponytail Sterling felt like she was going to combust. It was her own suit, but ever since April put it on, she never wanted it back as long as it meant April would wear it. Finally she managed to utter a sentence.

-You look so good.

-I know. I always do. 

Sterling scoffed.

-Although, I could look better. -she started slowly walking over to Sterling unbuttoning her blouse as she did so.

-Oh my God. – The last word came out as kind of a stutter, as Sterling couldn’t think straight, quite literally.

April lowered her voice. -Did you just use the lords name in vain?

Sterling couldn’t hold back anymore; April was on the last button of her shirt. She bent down on her knees in front of April and undid the last button. April lifted Sterling’s chin and smiled down on her. She lent down and kissed her. Sterling felt like she was in a trance, like she was begging to the angel in front of her. Then April broke it off with a quick – Ok, time for the next outfit.

She reappeared out of the closet wearing a large grey hoodie and matching sweatpants, she struck a pose. 

-What do you think, do I get any street cred? 

-Oh for sure. Practically Highway cred. – April rolled her eyes, but Sterling ignored her and carried on. - I’m just mad that you still look good. This shouldn’t look good on you, you manage to pull everything off. 

-Are you mocking me?

-No, I’m being serious. You look all tough, like you could beet me up and I’d thank you for it.

April tensed up. Sterling realised that what she had said wasn’t appropriate in relation to the whole April’s dad situation. 

-Sorry, wrong choice of words.

April pulled a strained small smile and then came back to herself.

She walked up to Sterling.

-Well I can tell you what outfit I can definitely pull off.- At this she reached down for the bottom of Sterling’s top. -This one. – She lifted the top trying to get it over Sterling’s head. But Sterling hadn’t really lifted her arms, and so instead of a simple removal of a top, it ended up being kind of a strange wrestling match. Eventually Sterling won, and pulled her top down, she laughed as she said. 

-Wow, that was really smooth. 

April huffed. – Yeah well you weren’t being very cooperative. 

-Sorry, I must have missed the class on how to let your girlfriend remove your clothes, with the cheesiest lines you’ve ever heard. 

April cocked her head - Girlfriend?

Sterling suddenly got really nervous that maybe she had jumped the gun.

-Oh.. I didn’t realise we weren’t, yeah, umm…

April took her hand to reassure her. – I like it.- There was a comfortable pause between them. -Right, you’re turn to do a fashion show. Dazzle me. 

-What do you want me to put on? They’re my clothes. You’ve probably seen me wear most of them. 

April though for a moment, and then her expression changed.

-Put on one of your Sunday dresses.

-For real? 

April nodded. 

Sterling went into the closet and changed. -Ok, but I’m not sure why you want me to wear this, they’re not that exciting. – But as soon as Sterling stepped out and saw April’s expression, that thought dissipated. She gave a little shy twirl. – So you like it? Go on say something, you’re never usually this quiet. 

-Every Sunday I would see you walk into church in a dress like that, and every Sunday my body would go all jittery like it did just now. I always thought it was out of anger or in apprehension of any interaction. But I’ve just realised, it was so much simpler than that. You just looked really pretty, simple as that, you’re gorgeous. 

Sterling felt her face go crimson; she didn’t know what to do with herself. Luke would compliment her all the time, telling her she looked pretty, or some other fly away comment about her appearance. Then the words felt empty or like a self-esteem boost at best. But with April, the way she always spoke with such conviction, like every word was a deliberate choice made it feel so much more genuine, her words settling permanently into Sterling’s heart.


	16. Chapter sixteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a little treat. Next month is insanely busy for me, so just warning you. But thought I would leave a little something before that.

Sterling’s mum knocked on the door and entered Sterling’s room, she was greeted by a vision of April looking surprisingly sheepish sitting on Sterling’s bed. Whilst Sterling herself, wide-eyed, was standing beside her in one of her Sunday dresses. 

-Oh good, Sterling, you’re already dressed.

-Hi mom. 

-Hello sweetie. Now April, you’re more than welcome to join us today, if you want. We go to the same church anyway. I can phone your mother and tell her that she doesn’t have to worry about a thing. We can drop you off after the sermon. 

April tried to interject. -Actually, I-

-Ok brilliant, see you two downstairs. Also, Sterling, if you could check up on Blair and make sure she’s awake and ready, you know how cranky she can be with me in the morning. – she turned to face April- And it really is so lovely that Sterling has a friend again, I was always worried that because she had Blair she never sought out other close connections with people, at least platonically – she shot Sterling a glare- so I really am delighted that you two found each other, it’s always good to have a girlfriend or tw-

-Ok mum! Thank you for the psychoanalysis, I’ll check on Blair. 

April who at first had been the human embodiment of anxiety when Sterling’s mum entered was now grinning from ear to ear. After Sterling’s mum had left the girls, she turned to Sterling, slowly stood up and walked to her.

-This is quite the platonic relationship we have.

Sterling didn’t respond, just stared at the ground.

-Come on, I’m just teasing. 

Sterling desperately wanted to change the conversation. - Do you want to borrow one of my dresses? 

-No, I’ve worn about four separate outfits of yours in the past hour, I’m scared if I wear anymore, I'll become you. I already feel clumsier. 

-You could have just said no. 

-Now where’s the fun in that. 

Sterling still clearly hearing her mother’s words rattle around her mind, distracting her, she blurted out. - It’s not like you have friends either. 

April looked confused at the conversation change. -First of all, uncalled for. And second of all, I have friends!

-Who hate you.

-They respect me.

-They’re scared of you. 

-Well I would rather have friends who are scared than no friends.

-Of, course how could I forget, the true mark of friendship, tyranny. Actually, you know what, ummm… I’m glad I don’t have any friends, then I’m not overruled by a dictator. 

April huffed and took her bag with her change of clothes and stormed into the bathroom to get changed. 

-I’m sorry. – said Sterling through the door. – that was uncalled for. 

April didn’t reply, after changing she strode out of the bathroom through to downstairs. Leaving Sterling alone, feeling numb. 

The car ride to church was full of tension to say the least. April sat next to Sterling at the back seat glaring out of the window. If she thought the car was a bit too close to the seething hot rage of April Stevens, sitting shoulder to shoulder at the pew practically scorched her alive. She could feel April breathing, her chest rising and falling. Sterling gulped. She tentatively searched for April’s hand, as soon as she found it a spark shot through her arm. She tried to intertwine their pinkies, but April snatched her hand away, all whilst staring directly ahead. Sterling turned to her left to see if Blair had noticed. Blair could see something was bothering her sister, so they twin spoke.

-What’s wrong?

-April’s mad at me.

-She’s always mad at everyone, you're not special.

-Not helpful.

-Ok, sorry, what happened?

-I called her a tyrannical ruler over her friend group.

-Are you wrong?

-Yes!.. no? I don’t know, but it upset her, and now she wont hold my hand.

-You want to hold her hand in church? I know God’s cool with it, but I don’t know if all these Godly people will be. 

-Whatever. 

Sterling stuck her tongue out at Blair and then turned to try and listen to the pastor, but couldn’t concentrate on anything he said, something about how his grandmothers dog blessed him of his sins when he was a young boy, no that clearly wasn’t it. Suddenly Sterling felt April’s foot apply pressure to the side of hers. Sterling stopped breathing, just in case it was a mistake and April though it was the benches leg. Then she felt April’s hand stroke Sterling’s forearm. Sterling turned to look at April for an explanation, but April kept her gaze firmly directed on the speaker. Then April’s hand slowly rubbed against Sterling’s thigh. Sterling nearly made some kind of noise, she wasn’t sure if it was going to be a scream or a moan, but luckily, before any sound escaped her lips, she firmly clasped her hand over her mouth. Wide eyed she looked at April who was now finally looking back, with the smuggest expression on her face. If anything felt like a sin to Sterling, it was seeing that lopsided smirk plastered on her angelic face. 

It felt like the longest sermon of Sterling’s life, the whole time April kept teasing her, caressing some part of her body, all whilst upholding an air of complete innocence, meanwhile Sterling felt like she was going to explode. After the final pray, and everyone started getting up. April leaned into Sterling and whispered into her ear.

-I really do look positively ravishing in your Sunday dress. 

-Right, that’s it. -Sterling grabbed April’s hand and told Blair and her parents, that they were just going to use the restroom, and to just wait for them in the car. The parents didn’t think much of it. But Blair looked at Sterling dragging April by the hand to the restroom and knowingly smiled. -Get it girl. - she thought.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you enjoyed it and want me to keep going x


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